3rd Wedding Anniversary

George and I celebrated our third anniversary July 20th, by going to a comedy show we had both been looking forward to.  While this may not seem exciting, for old folks such as ourselves, we never go out on dates. Primarily, this is due to not having anyone to watch Lily, so when we saw that Billy Gardell was coming close to Pittsburgh actually on our anniversary, I was super excited and we made plans--bought tickets and found a babysitter immediately!

This past year we just started watching Mike & Molly and it easily became one of our favorites to watch together. I mean, she's a teacher, he's a cop, he's got a controlling mother who doesn't like his wife...it's like watching us on tv each week! haha  (I am, however, so thankful George is not still a police officer!) 

We headed to the casino which was about an hour and 15 minutes away from our house.  It was a pretty drive where we got to talk uninterrupted. That, in itself, was awesome!

Billy Gardell is from Pittsburgh, so he incorporates local stories into his show which are pure comedy classic!  He had a guy open for him who was also local and a longtime family friend of Billy Gardell who was pretty funny as well.  He was a good warm up.

During Billy's set {I wish he were my friend, so I'm going to call him Billy.}   he talked about his family and friends who were at the show by name and funny enough, one of his cousins was a police officer that George used to work with! Small world.  

We had a great time laughing and being a couple for a few hours without kids--despite all the kicking the baby was doing from her mama laughing super hard!

I adore this man and love that he loves me even when it's not easy.  We've been together for 6 years, married for 3. A lifetime will not be long enough...

Happy Anniversary, my love! ♥

Hormones are No Joke

Pregnancy is seriously weird.

I find myself ready to either smash someone's face in or I'm a blubbering mess over nothing.  It's annoying.  Even to me.

Case in point.

A couple days ago, George and I were moving a new bed into our room, getting rid of Andrew's and moving our old bed into his room.  Sounds simple enough.

Not too long before that I was watching the news coverage about the Oklahoma tornadoes and also about a Phoenix police officer killed this week.  The officers daughter was graduating from kindergarten and hundreds of police officers showed up to her school to watch her graduate that day. It was moving and I was emotional about it.

For lots of reasons. 
I have an affinity for kids...especially kindergarteners.
It's almost the 18 year anniversary since my own dad died.
I'm pregnant and hormonal and everything makes me cry.

As we were moving the old bed out of our room and sweeping up the dust that was under the bed {keeping it real, folks}, we ended up getting into a ridiculous argument.  And of course, in the middle I started crying.  I full on own that I was the one yelling and crying while trying to explain my point.

After a few more moments of ridiculousness, George said, "I don't want to fight with you about putting a bed together. I'm sorry."  As I was explaining what I was mad about, I kept on crying, saying how annoying it was even to me that I can't help the waterworks. 

G with a vacuum in his hand, me with a broom I'm sure he thought I'd ride away on, standing on opposite sides of the room, all the while I'm just blubbering mess trying to explain all of this.  He laughed and I laughed.  He's lucky he laughed in an okay moment though hahahahaha!

I cannot wait until we have this baby.

Thankfully I have a husband who loves me and does his best to be understanding to my crazy.

 

Real Life's Happenings

It has been nearly a week since I posted much, so I'll try to catch up some on what's been going on.

~Primarily, I have been making conscious efforts to spend less online time and more real life time when my family is home and awake.  It's easy to read online while watching tv or while the kids are doing homework, but I've been picking up a magazine instead when I've wanted to flip through and do some mindless reading. Just more unplugging.  Plus, having a very active 14 month old inevitably limits the do anything except chase someone time. :)

I also know that with colder weather coming, we'll be indoors a ton more than I like and there is plenty of down time for online time.

~In addition to that family real life time, George and I have been shifting focus back onto our relationship as husband and wife also--making efforts to remove the mama and dad hats and giving our marriage some tender loving care.  It's been wonderful.  I love the communication and connection. Honestly, what I love the most is that he expresses this so much too.  It makes my heart spill over to see this man, who I adore, in a way that no one else has ever seen because it was me he waited his whole life to share himself with. 

We both truly believe this is essential for our happiness as individuals and as a couple.  Nothing was wrong, neither of us wanted to get to the point where it would be, so, proactively, we decided to shift some of our focus. For each of us, it was different places to adjust. It makes me happy and I'm looking forward to the weekend.
Yesterday after having been so open and communicative with my husband, I heard Brad Paisley & Carrie Underwood's "Remind Me" while in the car and cried.  It's that type of place we don't want to be.
My favorite line, "If you still love me, don't just assume I know..."  Yeah, it's that effort that needs to happen. The loving, caring in daily life.

~Speaking of the weekend, Andrew's dad will be in town for a conference and Andrew is thrilled to see him! Reagan will be with BM, so we're thinking about getting a sitter for Lily!  Even if we don't, she'll be in bed and we'll still have our time. I just need to make sure to take a nap, so I don't fall asleep super early haha!

~We're also looking for a church.  We've been talking about what we each want to get out of a church, so that we look in the right places.  The thing about Pittsburgh is there are so many older, tradtional churches and that is just not what we're looking for.  We have a few to check out and we're researching more.

~Lily still won't walk.  Keyword: won't.  She'll do it all day long, if she's holding onto even just my pinky finger, but aside from taking 4 steps here and there, she drops and crawls. Fast. Between her daddy and myself, I don't know where she could have possibly ended up with stubbornness. ;) She sure likes to climb though. The steps, the dog cage, onto the couch, the chair, up onto everyone, into the tub. She has no fear climbing. She is definitely our little monkey.  I guess I should have really known in utero.

She literally picks up things off of her dresser with her feet while we change her diaper! And typically whatever she's doing, she's got one leg hiked up ready to climb. She is a sweet little monkey who brings us so much joy!

~I've been working to declutter and make better use of our space. It's a slow process and the toddler who doesn't toddle yet and her whirlwind messes all day sometimes make it difficult to get much accomplished, but we're getting there. I enjoy my days with Lily and know all too well how quickly they're no longer little, so the wake of her tornadoes don't bother me.

~Christmas cards are also on my mind.  You know why? Because when you get this year's card, you're also going to get last year's and Lily's birth announcements.  Yeah, that.  I'm determined to get this year's out on time.  I still have baby gift thank yous too.  I'm the worst at this. :(  So, I made certain to change it with the birthday thank yous and they went out!  It doesn't mean I do not care or appreciate people. It's just one of those things that gets left behind and I hate it.  So, be on the lookout for a recap of cards coming with this year's Christmas cards.

~I've also been trying to get the blog caught up, but will just post them back to the appropriate dates since the whole purpose is for me to keep this journal. :)  So, if you see random stuff, that's why. I'm also working on getting my pages finished up at the top of the blog.  The Team page was done most recently. :)

That's it for now! It's lunch time for the monkey!

Bananas anyone?

Anniversary Date

We had a great time on our anniversary date!

The kids were dropped off with Granny and Pappy (my parents' friends who've taken us in as their own) for their own fun night of swimming and supper and just general grandparent-type enjoyment. ;)

This was the first time we left Lily with anyone except each other too. ;)  She didn't miss us.

We went to The Cheesecake Factory, as we've wanted to go there for a couple years and just haven't.  George LOVES cheesecake, so that's another reason we've been wanting to go.

We enjoyed our entire dining experience...which is a HUGE feat because inevitably when we go out, there's something that gets messed up and we have horrible or mediocre service.  Thankfully it was all GREAT!

The food was delicious, the cheesecake was yummy and we. were. stuffed.

We had a ton of leftovers, so we got to enjoy all that goodness again today. ;)

Our First Married Anniversary

George and I celebrate a lot of anniversaries together.  We have a family anniversary--the day Andrew and I moved to Pittsburgh and we became a family of 4.  Our "moon-iversary" when we knew we were falling in love. The anniversary of the date we met in person.  Our engagement anniversary. You get the idea.

Our wedding anniversary comes at the beginning of a couple other important celebrations in our lives...George's birthday and of course, Lily's birthday.  We apparently just do it big. :)

We had planned on a lovely fall wedding and that was "the plan".

In all reality, we got married last summer because it was important to my husband that we be married before our daughter was born.  He asked my mother for permission and told her he wished he was able to ask my father too.  There was no mistaking that I was 9 months pregnant and we wanted something private, just for us.  Our witnesses and the reverend who married us were (are) dear friends of both of ours who have walked beside us in some of our darkest days and it was only fitting that they be part of this intimate, special time for us as well. We're grateful for them in our lives still.

We do still plan on having a public ceremony in the future in which we will celebrate with our children as well, as the only child present at our private wedding was Lily (in mah belly).   We're very much looking forward to that.

It was hot.  Not quite as hot as this year, I don't think. But, 3 days before being induced and 4 days before Lily's birth, I just remember feeling swollen and sweaty! :)  Aside from that, I cried throughout the ceremony. I was pregnant overcome with love and emotion and just cried...he made me laugh.  It was simple and sweet. We didn't dress up--we probably would have had heatstroke. 

I. wouldn't. change. a. thing.

Happy 1 year anniversary to my husband! I am so proud and honored to share your name and your life.

One Year

As I said the other day, life is immersed in all things first birthday party! 

Shopping, planning, crafting, creating, practicing and I'm hoping my vision all comes together.

So far, so good.

Other than my need to do everything myself.  I guess I have this dumb standard I set for myself of being "enough" for my kids, but doing it all.  I did it all with Andrew's parties and don't want Lily to not have the same thing. 

Which ends up meaning, a lot of stress for me trying to pull it all together and get everything done.

After the last few days and finishing a couple important projects that turned out EXACTLY as I hoped (see above pic), I'm feeling a little less stressed.  The menu is easy since we're grilling and all the cutesy stuff for the food table is planned, as well as the details. 

I still need to pick up silverware and random things like waterproof paper, but when the vision comes to fruition, I will be thrilled!  I've gotten a lot of ideas from fellow bloggers, as well as on Pinterest and then have created my own party.  Kind of the same as in teaching, ideas from others get tweaked into something a little different to work for one's own style.

One thing I'm grateful for is a husband who makes life easier for me by letting me run errands to pick up party and project stuff I need...without children in tow!  Life saving! There's no distraction for me and the ease of quickly getting in and out of the car--just me--is such a stress reliever. :)  As dumb as that sounds, the traffic around here is a nightmare these days--construction EVERYWHERE, so even getting where I need to go takes forever.  I'm grateful for his help in that way.  Thanks, babe!

Our first anniversary is also approaching which we're both excited for! Next week is a busy week. We're planning on going out for dinner on our actual anniversary and then something even more special when Andrew is back in Nashville visiting his dad, so we only have to find babysitting for Lily for that time.

We've been together for over 4 years, but we're both committed to honoring each other and the day we married. 

Oh and George's birthday is in the middle of all that stuff too. ;)  He's been telling me for the last couple years how birthdays aren't that big of a deal, but I'm determined to put that zeal back in them for him.  Last year I was wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too pregnant to do much. We went to one of our favorite places to eat supper and enjoyed our last night home together as a couple without a baby since we knew we were going into the hospital the next night to be induced.  I don't want him to get lost in between our anniversary and Lily's birthday. (We had a BIG week last year! haha)

Clearly, I'm very nostalgic. I've been looking at pictures from this last year as I work on a project for Lily's birthday and I've found myself feeling a little depressed.  Not unhappy, rather just reflective and shocked that my baby's first year has literally passed by in the blink of an eye.

One year ago today... we celebrated getting our marriage license and we had 10 days left before Lily's arrival.

I may or may not have cried a little as I wrote this. ;)  I hope I get outta my funk soon.

What A Catch!

My husband went out of town last weekend.  Because this is the internet, I don't write about things like that in the moment for obvious safety reasons. But Andrew, Lily, and I had a great weekend and so did George.

For the last few years, he's headed to visit a friend of his in Kentucky once a year and they spend a guy's weekend fishing, playing guitar, drinking beer and just enjoying time away. 

His friend is expecting his first baby early next June, so the guys wanted to have one last time before his friend's life completely changes. :)  And of course, my loving husband needed and deserved some time fishing too! ♥

I also am one to think that time away is a good thing too...reminds you of how much you love each other, appreciate each other and value you the relationship. 

For me, since we started out long distance, it's reminiscent of the beginning of our relationship and falling in love which brings up really great memories and feelings. When one of us is gone, we talk each morning and night and I love the random texts of flirting and connection.  We're both pretty independent people who love our time together and value each other's need for time on our own. It's one of the things I really love about us as a couple.

I love to fish too, however I don't do all day fishing...so I'll bring a book to read or paper so I can write along with my fishing. It makes us both happy that way. It's been awhile since we've gone together, but I wanted to be sure George was able to go this year.

Success!

And to be sure Daddy knew Lily missed him too, we replied right back:

Outside Elements

Last week, I was watching the news here locally and was surprised to see a story about a murder in Arizona on Pittsburgh local news.
I had seen snippets of this murder on my news feeds I follow from AZ, but I hadn't yet read any details.

It was a case about a 35 year old woman who was dropping her children off at a karate lesson at a church and her ex-husband showed up and shot her.

The reason it was on the local news in Pittsburgh...She was originally from this area.

The woman's now husband...a friend I went to high school with.

Whoa.
I was shocked and saddened to see this man who I had known in my younger years on my local news grieving the tragic loss of the love of his life.

As a result, I have had a lot on my mind lately regarding relationships and the outside elements that affect our current ones.

My husband and I are happily married.
Truly. 
Now, it's most definitely not sunshine and daisies all the time.
We fight. We struggle. We disconnect.

The one thing I have noticed is when we're in that discontented state, neither of us is ok.

We both may retreat to our corners for a little while and then reconnect to talk and work through it.

Outside stressers used to be a greater source of our struggle.
But, my husband and I both agree that we are united against the outside elements that may try to divide us. 

Sounds pretty simple just typing it.

But, add in elements of crazy family, exes, and custodial issues, it has been challenging in the past.
Now, not so challenging.

I think about my friend who now will live his life without his wife because her ex-husband MURDERED her and I'm disgusted by what people do to one another. 
Who knows what he was thinking or what he said when he shot the mother of his children while those children were just inside the building. But the destruction and devestation will last a lifetime for her children and her husband. 

Which brings me back to the thinking I have been doing regarding my own relationships...

I can't escape the ex factor in my life.
Simply because we share children. 

As I have said before, my ex-husband and I simply talk about our son. We have a cordial relationship and our son benefits because there is no conflict.
We don't use him as "the middle man" to relay messages, we don't fight and when we DO disagree about something, we discuss it privately without our son's involvement. We discuss school, custody, birthday and Christmas gifts, insurance, doctor visits --you name it--as our son's parents. It's not a tumultuous relationship... More like a business relationship with the same vested interest.
We've both moved on in our romantic lives --I've remarried and he's engaged to marry a woman my son loves.  Our son has benefitted from having all of these people to love him.

Well, if you've read my blog, you already know about the ex factor on my husband's side. It's consistently filled with that same disgusting destruction I feel about what my friend and his stepchildren are now enduring. Unnecessary.
In comparison to the one ex factor in our home, there is no business relationship between my husband and his daughter's mother. Information is not given to us, discussions are not had, the child relays messages, the child hears disparaging and hurtful comments about people she loves. It is ugly and after 3 1/2 years, it appears there's no end.  It is something we recognize that no matter how much and hard we've tried, is what it is.

Life's too short.

The tumultuous ex factor in our lives was one of those outside elements that created issues we otherwise wouldn't have had.

For us, so much time and energy was devoted to preparation for our court case that we were simply emotionally exhausted at the end and there was nothing left to give. Add in dealing with our own feelings ABOUT the circumstances and occurances all centered around custody, it was really difficult at times.
Today, that outside element doesn't affect our relationship. We spent enough time learning how to work together externally and also within our home, that we're simply in sync about it 100% of the time.  It's a peaceful, satisfying feeling, as it wasn't always this way.

My husband and I were discussing this the other night after we had a different outside element attempt to stir the pot.

I'm grateful for the peace and happiness we have together. I'm grateful for the peace and happiness my son and my daughter have. I continue to work for my stepdaughter to know the same.

My high school friend is in town for his wife's local services.
The outside element in their lives, destroyed lives.
I wish my friend peace and happiness...