Monday, July 11, 2011

Not As Planned

We packed up, headed north about an hour and a half for the summer festival at George's parents' summer home.  We didn't go last year and 2009, was a rough one right after our miscarriage and I think we've come to the realization, it's just not for us.

We made it up one day before the drama started. 

My mother-in-law is not my biggest fan and that's no secret, but I've made the best of it by talking with Andrew about character and how to treat people. 
My children and my husband and I were looking forward to an extended weekend of fishing, fireworks, street festival, trash & treasure sales, a car cruise and just hanging out together and making the best of it!

George headed up the night before the kids and I did in order to get the boat ready and all of his shit that takes forever to do manly stuff done. :)   I learned later that as soon as my MIL was aware I was about 2 minutes away, she went inside the house from where she was sitting on the porch.  The tone was pretty much set in my husband's mind.  It was pouring raining, so George and I got the kids out of the car and into the house via umbrella covering and only unloaded necessities (i.e. Lily's bed and food).

She didn't say hello.

MIL went back out the porch while I got Lily's bed set up. George headed across the street with the baby to show her off. :) 
Shortly after, I overheard MIL saying, "Oh here comes the baby! Ooh look how cute she is! Oh give me that baby!" etc., expecting to see my husband and daughter. 


All the fawning was over someone else's baby who stopped by. 

As stupid as this sounds and not be a witness to it, she doesn't treat her own flesh and blood that way. It just hurts me that it's hurtful to George.  His mother has nothing to do with any of our kids and she used to adore George's first daughter.

Lily at 11 months has seen George's mom now 7 times.  They live literally 5 minutes away from us.

So, instead, we continued making the best of our family time.

After corralling Lily away from a saw, Raid wasp/hornet spray, 87432039 extension cords, plastic containers filled with prescription medications, ashtrays filled with cigarette butts, among other things, I finally laid her down for a nap and then took one myself.

George headed out to fish for a little while in the evening after we'd eaten supper while Lily, Andrew and I hung out and played.  Lily has started crawling like a little crab only on her hands and feet without her knees touching the ground. It's pretty cute and she moves pretty fast! We had a nice evening with our family.

The next morning, George headed out fishing again with Andrew while Lily and I snoozed a little bit longer...they headed out at 6:30am.

After fishing, the drama started.

As my MIL prepared for her houseful of guests, she ended up essentially picking an argument with my husband.  The subject usually returns to me, and this time was no different, but there were also other elements about my husband and he opted to express his feelings, stand up for us and said it was perfectly clear we were not welcome as she's continued to make herself heard loud and clear that she wants nothing to do with HIS family.  We packed up and headed home. 
I had zero expectations, therefore I wasn't disappointed because this type of drama is typical. I have to say though, I am so very proud of how my husband chooses to stand up for his wife and children. We both used to let so much go just for the sake of peace, but he reached a breaking point and it's sad, unfortunately, that it's with his mother.  But, truthfully, it's her loss.  He's an only child and she's missing out on the life he's created with his family.
As we packed up, Andrew kept watch of  Lily, so she didn't end up in any medicine or wasp spray ;). She's working on 3 teeth, so it was a drool fest too!
We stopped off for lunch on the way home and arrived home happily to a peaceful home. We were disappointed that the bulk of the events we were looking forward to were happening later in the day that we left, but our sanity and my husband's peace of mind was more valuable.


  1. Sorry to hear that you did not get to do the fun stuff you were looking forward to! Hugs. You're hubby sounds like an awesome man :)

  2. I'm sorry your weekend didn't go as planned. What a shame!

  3. oh Im sorry Steph you had to deal with that!! Really sucks she doesnt want anything to do with those cute kiddos...she'll regret it one day!!! And I agree with the pp your hubby sounds like a great guy for standing up to his mom.

  4. I'm so sorry Mrs. I. Thats some BS. But I'm so happy to hear that your hubs stood his ground and took care of his family. What a lucky girl you are to have a man that stands up to his mom. MIL can be rough. My ex- MIL was certainly no fan of mine. Remind me to tell you that tale.


    PS- your kids are awesome. The fact that people don't automatically love them is so befuddling to me.